How to be Kim . . .

My friend Jenny at work always comes up with fun little games that require a lot of thought. Her latest was for us to come up with instructions on how to be each of us. You'll understand when you see the ones they wrote for me . . .

How to be Kim (by Jenny)
1. Cry when you laugh (Love it! Love it!).
2. Understand the healing power of cookies (be they from Moe's, Einstein's or Nature's Table).
3. Never leave the house without your makeup.
4. Be bubbly and enthusiastic like Smurfette. You are a cheerleader after all!
5. Refer to your child as "The Kid." Before you know it, Steve will be "The Husband."

How to be Kim (by Brad)
1. Pick fights with other cheer moms.
2. Imitate obscure celebrities (Tyra Banks).
3. Be generous.
4. Never order anything "as is."
5. Work for every business in your hometown.

The ones that might need explaining are as follows:
-I almost always buy a chocolate chip cookie at lunch, wherever we go.
-I put makeup on just to run to the grocery store on Sunday morning. You never know who you'll run into!
-For those of you that don't know, yes, I'm a cheerleader. I am on the parent squad at Carissa's cheer gym. GREAT fun . . . really!
-The cheer mom reference is because I almost got in a fight with a cheer mom in Jacksonville back in January. Hey . . . she stole my seat and was REALLY rude!
-I recently found out that I do a "fierce" Tyra impersonation. Didn't know I could.
-I hardly ever order something "as is" at a restaurant. There is usually something on it or with it that I don't like. I can't help it that I'm picky. It's probably my mom's fault. (Just kidding, Mom!)
-As a teenager, I think I had about 400 jobs.

SURPRISE!

Maybe a month or so ago, Carissa and I came home from cheerleading practice, and since all of the lights are off, I turned on the kitchen light. I then proceeded into my bedroom, where the kitchen light was now projecting a faint amount of light. Just enough light for me to see that the cats were both very occupied with something! I chased them away from whatever it was (I still couldn't see it), and stepped over the unknown object to turn on the light in the bedroom. As I was in midstep it dawned on me that it was a snake! Now, I'm not generally afraid of snakes as Steve has 3 of them. But a wild snake of unknown poisonousness makes me nervous. After the light was on and I confirmed that it was, in fact, a very pissed-off snake, I ushered the cats out of the room. I yelled for Carissa to bring me a tupperware thing to put over it. What does my child bring me? A sandwich sized one! After yelling and possibly throwing the container, she brought me one that was much bigger. I contained the baby snake, that by now was striking at the tupperware container. Of course, this makes me think it's a rattler. I called Steve, who was at the pottery studio. I told him I had it contained, and he said he'd be home soon. Then I needed to watch the little guy and wonder what type of snake he was. Steve had some experience with pygmy rattlers, and he would know if it was one. I also thought it might be a harmless corn snake, as we had found one on the patio the year before. This one was much less colorful than that one, however. And the internet was down. But then I started to worry that the snake would sufficate under the tupperware. So I kept tilting the container up so air could come in. I did this as carefully as possible, so as not to let said snake out! Then I decided it would be much easier to release the snake if there was something hard under the snake. So I slid a metal cookie sheet under the container. The cold surface made the snake sluggish, and I again felt bad for him. So I got the hair dryer and would keep warming up the tray for him. However, the warmth reminded him that he was mad and he would start striking again. So I decided to leave him alone until Steve got home. When Steve finally arrived home, he wasn't sure if it was a corn snake or a pygmy rattler either. After noting that he was impressed with my decision to put the cookie sheet under the snake, he took the snake outside and threw him into our neighbor's yard (they keep a VERY bright light on all night that shines in our bedroom). Problem solved. The next day at work I looked him up online. I really think he was just a corn snake. =)

Spring Cleaning

Wow! We've been busy around the house lately! Steve and Carissa have been on spring break, and I took a few days off earlier in the week. I did the inside cleaning, and Steve did the outside. He trimmed everything the yard guy won't do, and he also pressure washed. The house looks great!


I have this obsession with tababeuia (sp?) trees. They are absolutely beautiful. My friend, Lisa, gave me a sapling that I'm trying to grow in a pot. It hasn't gotten much bigger, I'm guessing because it's still in the pot. I would like to wait until we move to plant it. But I sure was surprised this week to look in the backyard and notice that my neighbors had 2 of them in full bloom! They must not have been old enough last year to bloom, because I think I would have noticed it! Isn't it beautiful!?

Flat-Tire People Unite!

I had mentioned in my first blog entry that a friend of mine encouraged me to start my own blog. Well, it's actually the sister of a friend of mine that I work with. But she's given me permission to bookmark her blog, so I consider her my friend too, even though I've only met her once. Anyway, I was reading Bonnie's blog today and I read the funniest story! As you probably know, I have an uncanny knack for getting flat tires. So much so that I ALWAYS check my tires before I get in my car. And whenever I hear funny noises I turn down the radio to make sure my tire isn't flat. Well, Bonnie recently had a flat tire. Here is her story. It will make you laugh . . .

A hitchhiker's guide to Fort Knox
I was running late this morning, on my way to Annabelle's parent-teacher conference. As I was driving down our street, I thought the car sounded a bit funny, but I was a woman with a mission, and I wasn't about to be stopped by some stupid sound. Until I saw the mailman jumping up and down, waving at me. This seemed a little more vigorous than his usual greeting, so I rolled down the window. "You have a flat tire," he informed me. A flat tire? You mean like this?




I stuck the car back into its parking space behind the house and rang my next-door neighbor's doorbell. Unfortunately, she wasn't there, and it was starting to look like I was going to have to walk. That wouldn't have been such a bad thing (nice and warm here today), but it's a good 20-minute walk, and I had 5 minutes to make it to the meeting. So as I trotted down the street, I decided to flag down the first car I saw and throw myself on the driver's mercy. I wound up catching a soldier in a pickup truck. I asked him if he would mind driving me to my daughter's school without raping me and leaving me for dead in a gutter somewhere. He was agreeable to my terms, so off we went. I made it to my meeting, unraped and undead (but not in a zombie way), with seconds to spare.

The meeting was pretty much what I had expected: "Wow, what a great kid! So smart and so polite! Truly a pleasure to have in class! A testament to your superior parenting." OK, maybe not that last part, but the rest is all verbatim.

I left the school and began my trudge towards home when . . . you guessed it . . . it started to rain. Lo and behold, a car pulled up beside me, and the driver (this time a woman a little younger than me) rolled down her window and offered me a ride. Today seems to be my day to depend on the kindness of strangers, so I gratefully accepted and arrived home just before the sky truly opened up.

This was my first time hitchhiking . . . since 1987.

We Were Cheated!

I feel like all I write about is cheer, but that is all that we have going on right now! Carissa and I BOTH competed at the Swan and Dolphin Hotel this weekend at the Springboard Nationals Competition. The only out of state teams were from Pennsylvania and one of the Carolinas. Carissa's squad did amazingly well. They were in 1st place after Saturday's performance, but dropped to 2nd after Sunday's. Not because they did something wrong (they actually improved their score from Sat to Sun) but because the team that won first place improved drastically from Sat. to Sun. They had dropped two stunts on Sat., but hit their routine on Sun. They had much harder stunts than Carissa's squad, so they got more points. Stinks for our kids, because they have been SOOOOO close to 1st place so many times.

The parent squad, however, was robbed of 1st place. The team that we competed against was made up of cheer coaches and former cheerleaders. They were doing advanced stunting and tumbling. We are truly a parent squad, and we are made up of just average type parents that wanted to have fun. The crowd cheered louder for us, and I think everyone knew that the other squad was basically cheating. The worst part is that they had sent us an e-mail in response to a query we had sent them that said they had NO coaches on their squad. They said that last year they had a parent squad and ended up competing against a squad that had coaches and that they lost. They didn't think it was fair. They said you just have to hope that the other squads will have as high of morals as they should and that the cheer organization will take action against those that abuse the system. But they put coaches on their team anyway! So not only did they cheat, they also lied! I'm still very bitter. We had the opportunity to put an older kid on our squad that could tumble (but wasn't a parent, obviously) and we chose not to. So we competed with integrity and I guess that's better than winning without integrity. At least that's what everyone keeps telling me!

Spring break is coming up for Steve and Carissa, and I will be taking a few days off, too. I need to clean my house! I'm looking forward to a few days off with my family!

Another Competition Down - 2 More to Go!

We had the competition at TD Waterhouse this weekend. This was just a one-day competition, thankfully. The company that organized it, however, isn't known for staying on time. The squads were running about 30 minutes behind, on average. Carissa's squad had one other team in their division, and it was a team that they had beaten in Atlanta. We had our hopes up, but they came in 2nd again! They were very disappointed. The routine was as perfect as it could have been. The other squad had harder stunts, but they were incredibly sloppy! We aren't sure how they ended up winning.

Some fun news from the cheer gym . . . one of the families is a finalist for the TV show Wife Swap! The show was looking for a family that is involved with competitive cheerleading, and the family that applied has all 5 members of the family cheering! The mom and dad are both on the parent squad, and their 3 children also cheer. The show was excited to learn that this family also has 2 boys that cheer. The show is coming to the cheer gym tonight (Monday) to videotape the kids' practice, AND the parents' practice! That means me, too! How fun!

Duchess and Adonis

Okay, to give equal time, here are our current pets. Our cat is Duchess - she's the Siamese looking one. The other cat is Adonis, and he belongs to the Storins whose house we're staying in. We've kind of adopted him. We call him Fuzzy, and he's a good cat and very affectionate. A favorite spectator sport in our house is "Kitty Wrestling." When we first moved in, Duchess would stalk after Adonis and it looked like she was beating him up. Eventually I guess he decided he liked it, because now he tries to get her to chase him. Typical, right? It's quite funny, and it always ends up with Duchess spitting out a huge clump of fuzzy gray fur. He never gets her, for some reason.

Look at this puppy!

A friend of mine at work sent me a picture of this puppy. It is his grandmother's or his aunt's or something. Anyway, I'm obsessed with this dog. I swore I would never have another dog after Amos, but this one has caught my fancy. He is a Bijon Frise and a Terrier mix. After we have our own place, I'll think of getting one. Of course, Steve wants a beagle to name "Buster." I think this little dog is much cuter, don't you? =)

Carissa is 11

Well, I guess I did this a little out of order, but not much. Carissa turned 11 on February 8. We were at a cheer competition on the weekend of the 4th, so we did her party on Sunday the 12th. We met at West Oaks Mall food court for lunch and cake, and then went to see the new Pink Panther movie with Steve Martin. It was typical "Pink Panther" stupid humor, but the girls all enjoyed it. She invited friends from her cheer squad, from her middle school, and friends from long ago. Everyone got along great and had a good time!

It had been a busy weekend for Carissa! On Saturday she had a birthday party to go to at Universal Studios (it rained so they didn't get to ride roller coasters), then she had a cookie booth. After her birthday party on Sunday, she had a Girl Scout meeting and another cookie booth!

Atlanta was GREAT!

Well, Carissa's biggest competition of the cheer season is over! We went to Atlanta for the Cheersport National competition on Friday the 17th. I drove with my friend Margaret, but Carissa had to ride the bus on the way up with her team. Steve and I decided he shouldn't go to Atlanta because we wouldn't be able to afford the bail after he killed someone! So he stayed home and held down the fort (and scooped the cat box!). Carissa's squad did great! It was a two day competition, with each day counting as 50% of their score. They came in 7th out of 11, which for their squad is phenomenal! The other MAC squads did well, but the oldest group of kids did the best . . . they came in 3rd! We were all very happy. We came home Sunday afternoon instead of waiting until Monday morning, and we were back in Orlando by midnight. So we had all day Monday to relax. The bad news is that I'm sick now! I have laryngitis (I'm sure that's from screaming over the weekend) and also bronchitis. I'm feeling better than I was yesterday, though. I'm sure I'll be back at work tomorrow!

In the meantime, Carissa is preparing for another competition this weekend! They'll be at the TD Waterhouse Center in Orlando for a state competition. The biggest news is that the Big Macs (the parent squad I'm on) will be performing, too! Woohoo! You can check out the parent squad routine at this website: http://www.macallstars.com/2006_Spirit_Cheer_DP.html Just turn down your volume a little - there is someone screaming on it!

A New Blog!

I was told by a friend that I should start my own blog. After much consideration, I've decided to do it. What a great way to keep everyone up to date on the goings on of the Czerniejewski family! I hope you all enjoy my blog. I'll keep it updated regularly!